I haven’t been on Tumblr in quite some time, and it was really freeing. I have spent more time living my life, rather than posting something online to anticipate reactions from my followers. I felt bound to this blog and since cutting my dreads it feels like I have been able to let go of that burden I carried with me (even subconsciously). I hated being a target of ridicule and yet, repeatedly, I put myself out there to this collection of young adults who never grew out of bullying. Granted there were a lot of people who’s words were a breathe of life to my soul but i needed to step away from this to protect my heart and my self image.
I hated who I became the last few years… just hanging on every ‘like’ and ‘reblog’ as if it actually gave my life some sort of worth or purpose. I realize now that GOD gives my life worth. GOD is the ultimate breathe of life and nothing and no one can satisfy my craving for unconditional love and attention like God does- not even my dear husband. The world is not capable of filling my cup to the point of overflowing, but when I look to prayer, I get an amazing feeling in my heart and my body too. After reading the bible, and taking it all in, I literally feel like my heart could burst out of my chest and spew gold glitter all over the place! I’m serious- that’s the amazing feeling that God gives me! Every time I pick up my bible to read, I know once I shut the book I will have goosebumps and butterflies and a reignited flame in my heart… Oh I cannot explain how good it feels to
Fall out of love with this world, and more in love with Jesus.
Tumblr is not (and will not) be where I attempt to find my self worth EVER AGAIN.
500days-of-sydney: What does your husband think of your shaved head? Does he like it or is he looking forward to you growing it out?
He supports me and knows what it means to me but I think he’s curious and excited to see what straight hair will look like since we met when I had dreads.